Juvenile Detention for Teens in Trouble: Preventing Felonies in the Long Term
Filed under: American Jobs Act, Financial Resources for Felons
Teenagers. At one moment, they are can be the most loving children, full of empathy for others and dreams for their future ambitions. And then, in a split second, focused on hair, the ignorance of parents and expressions of distress over the burden of going to school and doing homework. Who is this child you ask? Where is my sweet boy of just a few months ago? You may even ask yourself what you have done, as a parent, to create such an emotional rollercoaster ride within your child and even have fears that your own child may face criminal charges, juvenile detention, or struggle with their own felony conviction.
The answer to these questions and concerns is very simple: puberty has set in. Understanding the physiological and cognitive changes of your teen may assist you in retaining your sanity while progressing through adolescence while nurturing this child into a fully productive and responsible adult.
Most research indicates the primary basis for such erratic behavior in a teenager, both male and female, is the hormone. With hormone fluctuations beginning in girls as early as two years prior to boys, the fluctuations physiologically will result in verbal and physical power struggles between the teenager and his peers, teachers and parents. This is normal behavior. Communication, which used to be a simple task, can, at times, become unbearable. The key to working through the teen years is learning coping mechanisms, as a parent, to create positive experiences during the power struggles.
In addition to physiological hormonal changes, teenagers also begin to experience a change in cognitive thinking. This is the period in their lives when critical thinking skills begin to develop and your teen will begin to understand the world is no longer black and white. This is the period when they begin to grasp the concept of “gray areas” and realize their parents can and will make mistakes. When developing their own opinions about the world around them, you, as the parent, will become the primary target of their expressions, both good and bad.
With understanding the cognitive and hormonal aspects of your teenager, you begin to understand your parenting style must also change to accommodate the changes within your child. For most non-life threatening issues, allow your child to make decisions and deal with the natural consequences. For example, my thirteen year old son refuses to complete his homework. As a result, he will fail math this year and will end up in summer school. While this is rather inconvenient, it is not a life threatening matter and it is a decision he will make and will suffer the “natural consequence” that comes along with his failure to self-motivate. It is by parental allowance of natural consequences that your teenager will come to realize that it is by his actions his life will be primarily impacted and may also impact others.
In situations where punishment is needed, deciding what the appropriate type of punishment is can be a tough road to travel. Research has shown that isolation and physical force may provide immediate results but do not provide lasting results. In some cases, this may be harmful to your child’s self esteem. One part of maturing through this period, as with natural consequences, is also learning to take responsibility for inappropriate as well as appropriate behavior. Be sure to give positive feedback when your teen follows through on what is expected on a daily basis. Research has shown that positive feedback will promote self-worth, improve self-esteem and improve communication and provide long term significant growth over negative reinforcement.
The primary message to remember is that your teen’s change in attitude may not be a reflection on your parenting skills. You also have a right to feel worn out and emotionally drained from the daily struggles. The key here is to understand the changes going on within your teen and tap into resources for guidance, obtain affirmation in your approach and lead your child into a healthy adulthood. For many parents, this complication with a troubled teen may encourage one to engage in education surrounding teen health and even pursue jobs for nurses, caring for teens who are troubled. No matter where your path leads you, there are options for your family.
As resource recommendations, consider such books as “Parenting Teens with Love and Logic” by Foster W. Cline, M.D. and Jim Fay, (Pinon Press, $21.00) or “Stop Negotiating With Your Teen: Strategies for Parenting Your Angry, Manipulative, Moody, or Depressed Adolescent” by Janet Sasson Edgette (Peguin Group USA, $13.95). Both of these reading materials provide explanations for the evolution of teens, solutions to parenting challenges and further resource materials. In the long term, it is most important to get your teen under control so as to avoid their own complications with a felony conviction.
In Jobs for Felons, Image is Everything
Filed under: Education for Felons, Felon Motivation, Financial Resources for Felons, Living By Example
So, last week my aunt, who is a convicted felon x 2, went out looking for work once again after being denied employment due to her background. This time, she landed a job. Granted, it’s a job in fast food. But, the difference between this fast food employment interview and all her prior employment interviews was her appearance. When she and I spoke about how hard it is to find jobs for convicted felons, I told her that I understand the great difficulty and I believe that if she improved her image, with some new prescription eye glasses, that this may make a difference. Afterall, shouldn’t a fast food joint want to hire a smart person? So, we ordered new prescription eye glasses for her from ZenniOptical.com. I use them for my own glasses because they have a great selection and they have online customer service that is excellent. Because we ordered from them, she had her glasses in a few days, changed her image to a person that appeared more smart – a true reflection of who she is. She went to her interview, told them she had a felony, and they hired her. If you are in the market for a new job as a convicted felon, be sure to update your image. Glasses are a great way to do that but also be sure your entire look and appearance are in line with what the employing company would like to see. When finding companies that hire felons, image really is everything!
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